Transition into Marriage: The Wedding Plan

 

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Currently, my thoughts on my class are helping me grow as an individual. I have learned a great amount of knowledge while reading the assignments. As of right now my major is psychology because I developed a strong interest in helping others and learning more about the mind and behavior. As a result of taking this class, it seems that my mind is taking me to switching my major form psychology to marriage and family studies!

This week, I was enlightened about the transition into marriage. For one, I am not married nor engaged, so I am glad that I was able to get some tips. I hope that for those of you reading, it can have the same effect.

This week I learned that it “matters how one proposes; it can either be meaningful or a show”, so in other words I learned that proposing at a stadium full of thousands of people might not be the best idea. I’m sure that there are many of us out there that have seen how in movies the guy proposed in some flashy way making it awesome. Well, I learned that this can potentially create problems later down the marriage. So for the guys reading this, in the future be genuine and private perhaps?

More importantly, what had a great effect on me is that when a couple is engaged it is important for both to be involved in the planning of the wedding. As we were discussing the importance of this, my professor mentioned that doing so will strengthen the relationship between the couple. Many times, the woman in the relationship is the one to plan the wedding with her own tastes and desires. I won’t say all men, but I believe it would be safe to say a majority of men don’t mind what their significant other does as long as it gets done. Yet, I learned that when men input their own tastes and ideas, it changes from a wedding for one to two.

Another important note is that an average wedding cost can be between $20,000 to $30,000…Now for me, that is a lot of money. Even so, a wedding is one to commemorate the joining of two people in love, so why not? At times, in order to make a great wedding there may be times that a couple will take our loans, incur credit card debt, or dig into their savings. There are even cases where the wedding is delayed longer while the money to afford the wedding is met. Yet, debt can create early stress and conflict in the newlyweds life. So, then what? Our professor shared an experience with us.

There was a couple that he was talking with and they mentioned about the costs of the wedding. They were concerned about the situation they were in and wanted counsel on what to do. In meeting with my professor, he asked them a few questions. Is there anyone in your family that likes to DJ? Could your aunts provide food? Is there a place where you could hold the venue for free? To each, he received an answer of yes. Towards the end, the couple had realized how much money they had saved. They only needed to think simply. For me, what I learned is that a simple wedding can be as great as any wedding.

It reminds me of the wedding of my older brother, which I missed as I was serving a religious mission at the time. It was simple, yet beautiful. There was careful planning and they saved money. It was a happy wedding. Dancing. Food. Music. Most importantly, there was family.

In all, when engaged work together to make the best of your wedding. Think simply and of those around that could help. When there is genuine love in a relationship growth is there.